~[:i.l.o.v.e.y.o.u//LxC\\i.t.r.u.s.t.y.o.u:]~

[Fantasy]

Time. It ticked. It tocked. It lasted. It passed. It lurched and lingered. It sped and raced. It changed constantly, but no matter who asked it to--Time never stopped. Be it God nor Goddess, time wouldn't stop. No one could control the endless movements of times that thread the strings of life and death from the point it began to the final millisecond. Time would continue on its merry way not giving a damn who wanted it to stop or just end even if someone wanted it to move faster. Usually, time did the opposite. Except tonight--Tonight, she had wanted it to move quickly so that she could prepare for a wonderful date with her handsome boyfriend, who she considered more like a king loving a peasant girl though she wouldn't dare tell him what she thought of their relationship sometimes. Time, however, decided it would go at light speed, no pun intended, and pass right on by the time he was supposed to arrive. His work shift was supposed to end at five so that the two of them could go out for a stroll when the world was golden and possibly go to a restaurant for supper, maybe even catch a late showing movie if they saw something interesting playing. Time usually didn't go against their plans, but tonight.

Her emerald eyes shifted impatiently toward the clock. Where, oh, where could he be? It was more so worry filling her eyes. Thoughts drifted to her mind with only hopes of causing her more worry. It was the curse of being a pessimist, really it was. She wished sometimes that she could be an optimistic hoot, but then she'd think back to Misa Amane--where was she now?--and how her little dream world came crashing down in smoke and flames when Cassandra stepped into the limelight as Light's best friend. The look on her face was priceless when she was told that Light didn't want anything to do with her even having taken that notebook straight from her before she knew what hit her--or that he'd be breaking up from the false relationship not two minutes later.

That notebook. She allowed her eyes to drift from the clock to the secure hiding space the thin black beauty was hiding without a single twit of a shinigami, aside from Ryuk, following her at any time. It was the best birthday present ever, and she didn't even ask for it. Oh, her boyfriend seemed to always know exactly what was best for her or what was in her interests. She had never really used it yet, for obvious reasons of Light being worried, but it was hers which made it worth while because Light had given her it. She hadn't been by chance walking and found it nor had she been nearly killed it get it--in a sense.

"Light," Her soft voice groaned as she stared over at the brightened kitchen. She had realized her dearest boyfriend was now four hours later, but she wasn't about to fault him if he was never going to show. This dedicated woman had cooked a fine meal for him to wait. It was humorous to realize they were now dating for nearly three months now. It made her giddy to know that something was finally working out. She had finally found somewhere to belong. That place was her favorite place. She belonged right between two strong arms that had a gentle Japanese tan and were connected to God, himself.

Her eyes stared out into the winter's sky wondering exactly if he'd be coming tonight. The man she absolutely adored to the point where she had made the first move. Oh, that's right. The night that lead to their dating was still fresh in her mind. It'd always be in there was one of her favorite days in her life. September 19th, she'd never dare forget the second time she kissed Light Yagami. Oh, he had taken her first kiss long ago nearly a full year now, but with the second one, that was the real magic. The rain had been thick that day when they had ventured out of the safety of a nearby restaurant, it seemed to have literally burst from now where. It was funny how a simple thing happened where she had claimed not to be able to see and he grasped her hand for them to rush under a local pavilion center. It was there, soaked,and smiling, she had made her move. Oh no, it wasn't a bam movement. He had noticed her shirt was nearly transparent which would have given any improper man a full on nose bleed from the way her laced undergarments showed through just as soaked leaving a slight view of what was even below that. Light had given her his jacket for some protection. It was that time, wearing his dark ebony jacket where his scent filled her so heavenly, she made that move. It had been abrupt and impulsive with how she took him by the nap of his neck forcing her lips against his. Sure, it wasn't her style, but she couldn't keep back the frustration that being near him and watching him gave her. Of course, even if she was trying to be roughly needy, it came out more as a needy failure until she smoothed it out with their lips parting more giving a bit of access which got it much more heated and partnered. Directly after, she had panted out that she believed her heart was becoming his or in other words, that she was falling in love.

A few butterflies invaded her belly making her giggle at the memory. Cassandra had tried so hard to be commanding, and he turned her to mush in minutes. Minutes. Time. Light. The words carried her back to her balcony feeling the breeze of winter whip through her thin nightgown even with the over coated robe on. The soft rose colored gown accented her pale skin tone that held a soft smile with the rose colored lips of hers that were outshone by her emerald eyes that sparkled brightly as she thought of her dearest Light. She allowed her pale hand to grip upon the thin black cell phone a tad tighter as she whispered gently, "I'm waiting, Light. I always have been."

She had said those words softly in reference to when L kidnapped him away which lead to her waiting out the year with his family becoming like part of the family by the time he returned to find her cleaning about his room like some beautiful maid that was young, a false girlfriend, and from his past life at the university. All of which, he'd probably joke around about being a plus since at times he now simply jokes about always having feelings toward her. It wasn't a like to him. It was a fancy, which seemed to fit better than the childish word his sister used against Cassandra during her later year at the household. Then again, Sayu always had mocked her with a stating that she knew all along that Light was going to fall in love with her. Now she's been listening to the girl ranting about them having a wedding, which always turns the usually pale woman into a nice shade of crimson until she has to laugh to keep from thinking of how splendid life could be if she was always with Light. Yet has come to terms, she isn't that wonderful to be a wife only a girlfriend. Since he hadn't even confessed to loving her yet, though she wass planning on telling him exactly the extent of her feelings that night.

If he ever showed..

[Cloudy]

Time was a bastard. So was every member of the task force, and as far as Light was concerned, their mums were as well.

They knew he wanted to leave early, to meet Cassandra—he had told them in advance that he wanted to go at fifty minutes past four and be at her home by five, but at the last second, they changed their stupid little minds and he had to work late. It’s not like his work affected anything, he made sure that everything they did seemed to move forward and yet lead nowhere. Nobody noticed. Nobody was going to catch on, that was his whole objective, and yet they still took his most precious time away for the sake of something he knew was completely meaningless. Aizawa usually left at five because he had a family and Light had plans for a date, yet they were kept for four whole hours past that time. Being L, he had to. Aizawa got to go at six, of course, but Light had to stay and supposedly work on some up-and-coming breakthrough which would obviously end in disappointment, another dead end. And it was perfect, or would have been, if they weren’t inconveniencing him with it.

The worst thing of all, the thing which made him feel guilt gnaw on his insides, was the fact that he hadn’t called her. He couldn’t, because at the task force, he wasn’t allowed to use the phone for outside calls. But he had his cellular phone and could easily have slipped in to the restroom for a moment to tell her. It’s not like she didn’t already know where he was. He told her, because it didn’t matter whether they thought Kira would find them or not. Kira was right there in the room with them the whole time. Damn it, he was already way too late and she was probably waiting there for him, all ready to go and probably not irritated with him at all, just worried, which made it even worse. If she would just yell at him a little bit, then it would be fine, but he would have to look her in the eyes and just hope that he didn’t see disappointment in them.

Once he was let out, of course, he wasted no time whatsoever. He went straight down for his car and opened up the door as he flipped open his cell phone. The least he could do is call and tell her he was on his way, so that he wouldn’t be completely rude and just show up late. Some surprises were nice, but if she figured by now that he wasn’t coming, he should at least call and ask if they were still able to at least have dinner. If it was too late, he would have to buy her flowers and try to make up for it. He really hadn’t meant for work to get in the way like this, and when things went off-schedule, he got very irritated. To the point of actually slamming the car door a little too roughly and making the whole car shake a bit. Cursing himself in his head the whole way, he dialed her number without putting the key in. He couldn’t speak on the phone and drive at the same time. Worst case scenario, he has to leave a message and hope she gets it by the time he gets there. He hit send a put it up to his ear, waiting.

“Damn,” he muttered under his breath. Light was punctual. Light was always on time, he never just vanished like this. Not even once. If he said he would be there, most of the time he would be there, but this once he got roped into the task force. It wasn’t that he forgot, or lost track of time. It was just that what he had to do was time consuming and difficult, so it took him all of four hours to do enough of it so that the task force would let him off, saying that capturing Kira took precedence over meeting up with his girlfriend. Those idiots obviously all either lived with their wives and hadn’t dated in years, or never understood what it was like in the first place. At least Matsuda understood, even if he didn’t let him leave either. Matsuda was also an idiot, but he was a romantic idiot, and that was really what counted in matters like this. He was a fool with stars in his eyes, love on his mind and male organs below it. Light knew now how it felt to have—he wouldn’t call it love, not yet, but it was well on its way towards that. And to some degree, he had experienced that starry-eyed feeling of infatuation as well. Especially the first month or so had felt particularly powerful.

He put the key in the ignition and went over the route to her home in his head. Not far from here. He should be able to make it soon, but he wanted to confirm via telephone first. Honestly, he would like it if she were mad at him, because then he could apologize and make up for it and everything would be alright. But he knew her, he knew that she wouldn’t yell or speak curtly to him. He wasn’t sure what she would be, but not that, and it made things complicated. If it bothered her and she never said anything, how could he fix it? Maybe he was getting ahead of himself as well. He would know nothing of how she was until she answered the phone, her home phone, and hopefully she was there to answer it. If not, maybe she was out grocery shopping, or taking that walk without him, or… he shook his thoughts from his head. No, that line of thinking would just make him become possessive and jealous. He did not want to be that kind of boyfriend. Sure, he accepted and even embraced that he had a protective streak, but taking that to extremes would be unnecessary.

Still. Light sometimes got little nagging hunches. It seemed like she would never want his pity, but his support, and yet she always had this feeling about her that said she thought she wasn’t good enough. It hurt, a little bit. He would never mention it, but it was there. If she wasn’t good enough for him, then nobody was, and he would feel alone. He didn’t want to be too good for her; he wanted to be just right, which he was. He was sure of it. The problem was in making her sure of it, too. It was the one thing he could never solve with logic, and honestly, he would also feel cheated if it was. He would just keep her happy and never pull a stunt like this again, then she would see that if he thought she was worth the effort, then she must be. And then things could get better, hopefully. He just needed that time.

Time that he had taken too much of. Her phone should be ringing, where was the pickup?

[Fantasy]

The task force? L? Kira? Cassandra Yulia knew every bit of that world. She knew that the task force was full of immature idiots, excluding his misguided father. She knew that L had once been the man at their university that went by the name of Ryuga, which had been attempting to capture him as Kira. She knew that the new L happened to be the same being which acted as Kira. Both of the roles were played by none other than Light Yagami, himself. It was interesting to know that she was part of that world now. She had become the true 'Second Kira'. Though she hadn't been allowed to use the notebook frequently or unless she saw a crime that needed to be tended to, he had still given her the weapon of justice on her nineteenth birthday. The thin binded notebook of mass destruction and righteous judgments had become hers to have and hold closely. No, she wasn't asked to be his goddess because they had only been close friends at the time, but now. Would she be considered that soon enough? Her cheeks felt warm at the thought. Being a Goddess would mean that I would have been loved by God and transformed from this weak person.. That single word stood out. Love.

Her mind shook free of such inappropriate thoughts. Any thought of herself by Light's side longer than this year was a miracle. She could accept that and embrace their time together while cherishing it deep within her very soul. Being with him even as a friend had been a string of breath taking moments made just between the two of them within secret moments. Her hand lifted from the thin cell phone and brushed against her lips. Her cheeks remained warm once more. It kept coming back to such thoughts in her mind. What if the two of them could create more memories? What if they lasted longer? Would they eventually live with one another? Could they be in lo- Her hand slowly curled into a fist as she gripped it firmly around the railing of the balcony. "You must be insane. Why are you asking for more now?" The woman whispered to herself woefully as she felt that cool breeze of the waning autumn which was so close to winter. So close that the weather didn't wait. Her toes crunched up a bit to stay warm within the cotton slippers. She felt her nose twitch a bit too. No, she wasn't going to go inside now. She would wait through any storm or season for him. She had before. Waiting for Light was something she had done from the moment she was seventeen. It would be silly not to continue waiting. She had waited to meet him at the age of eighteen up until she became his friend then she had been able to wait till long after she was nineteen and nearly twenty for her to finally love him. She could wait for his returned affection, and she could wait a few hours standing on the balcony of her apartment complex gripping the iced railing and looking below toward the lit parking lot. Cassandra would always wait for Light.

Her eyes fluttered from the half dreamed state caused by whirling memories and silly fantasies at a sound. What was that sound? Ring. Ring. Ring. She took a moment for her mind to make sense of exactly what she heard. Oh, well that was odd. Her eyes glanced toward the cell phone in her hand realizing it wasn't lit. That meant he must have called her home phone. She swiftly moved from the balcony feeling the glint of heat from the nearby fireplace as her body made its way from the cool breeze. The outline of her legs were seen through that silk rose colored gown with a golden trim around the bottom and neck line while having a similar pink colored eyelit lace around the sleeves and neckline with some at the bottom. The matching robe didn't allow much of the lace to show except from the bottom which was at her ankles and the 'V-neckline' that was only showing from the way she folded her robe across her body. The heat warmed her already flustered face when she reached the telephone.

The caller identification gave her that the number was his cell phone. He must have realized it might come up as restricted if he had used it inside of the building considering that was his phone as L also during emergencies. Though she understood exactly why he hadn't called her and she didn't fault him for it. Her hand gently grasped the thin phone as she lifted it up. How old fashion was she? This phone still had a spiraled up cord even with that new caller identification. She took a soft breath before speaking in her usual voice, not anything sugary sweet like Nerine's as she had attempted to use on him so many times before.

"Hello, Light." She wasn't overly formal, but she could hear the soft purr of his engine as if he were still in the parking lot. "I'm so glad you called. I wasn't sure if you'd still want to come over to my apartment instead, just for tonight. I know we had originally planned on going to a cafe, but I don't believe we'd be comfortable this late out." Oh my. She was rambling. Cassandra's fingers were laced in the cord as she tried to keep herself from being nervous. Phone calls with him always made her a tad nervous. She couldn't see his expression nor could she tell if he was masking his voice. There was no way to know if he had wanted to say something first or if she was saying too much or if he just wanted her to be silent for a bit so that he could get things off his chest. She twirled those fingers in and out of the cord in an absent minded manner focusing more on what his thoughts might be before she added, "Oh, but I'm not attempting to pressure you into coming over. You could go home if you're too tired. I don't mind. Honestly, I don't." She repeated herself. Lovely, she really wanted to see him tonight, and she was terrible at lying to him.

[Cloudy]

Trust. That’s what it all came down to for Light, trust. Given his line of work, his personality, and his goals in life, he could afford to trust very few people if anyone at all. So he didn’t. If something made him suspicious of them, nobody was safe, but Cassandra was the only person who had never done anything to make him wary of her motives. Even their first meetings, when he had been so sure she was out to get him, all she was really doing was protecting her own identity. He trusted Cassandra with everything, with his secrets and his thoughts and his time, and he was beginning to think that someday, he might even trust her with his heart. That was a lot coming from a man like him, who usually kept his heart right where it was the day he was born; in a cage of bone. He knew that he had her full trust as well. She was completely devoted to him, but not in the frightening way Misa was. No, she was different. She needed him, but she didn’t force that. Light needed some degree of space until he was comfortable, and Cassandra saw him on his terms, not hers. That meant more to him than it really should have.

He had to admit, while the phone rang, he was a bit nervous. Being late wasn’t something he did, he was punctual. When he heard her voice (soft and real, not her fake sugar-soaked tone) he wasn’t sure whether to sigh in relief or tense up and get ready to feel guilty. What she said caused both. She was glad that he called, and yet didn’t know if he still wanted to come? There was no longer time for going to the café, like he had told her he would. At no time had he told her maybe, or he might be a little late, or a lot late. He knew that she was awkward on the telephone, but still listened to her as she spoke. It was more pressuring to know that she felt like she might be, and her telling him that she didn’t mind was clearly a lie. She would mind if he blew her off like that. What girlfriend in their right mind wouldn’t? Besides, he had really wanted to see her. She was offering for him to come over, though, so he took an opportunity when he saw one.

“I’m sorry, I got roped into working late. I didn’t mean for that to happen. You can understand why I couldn’t call you around the task force.” Well, now he was stating the obvious. But he continued. “I want to see you, but if you’re irritated or even just tired, I can wait to stop by until tomorrow. I’ll make this up to you one way or another, I promise.” Now, he was getting somewhere. He had so far never promised her anything without following through on it, and he only promised about things that mattered. For example, he would never promise her flowers, or a nice day in the park. He would just bring her flowers or take her to the park, simple as that. Promises were more important to him. “But, if you would have me… I would be more than happy to come over.” He tried not to sound too needy, and to some degree, he succeeded. A tiny bit leaked through on accident, and he just hoped that she wouldn’t look down on him for being the sort of man who had to work late and then got desperate to meet after he had already passed the proper time.

Honestly, he wasn’t. He hated this, but he couldn’t change it now, only hope that she would allow him to show up. Although she sounded complacent enough on the phone, that was just the problem with phones. He wasn’t as anxious about it, but he had the same problem she did. How did he know she wasn’t angry? Tone of voice was only one indicator, and they were both skilled actors. She could be furious, or upset, or exhausted and he wouldn’t know at all. Granted, he would know if she had too much to drink, but the same went for anybody. She didn’t sound like that at all. He didn’t know what she sounded like, and if there was one thing Light loathed, it was not knowing something he felt like he should know. If he could, he would be over there right at this second, but the only thing he was capable of was sitting in his car and speaking with her on the phone so he could learn whether she even wanted him over or not. If she did, he would get there as fast as he could without breaking traffic laws. If she didn’t, he would go home, but he would not like it one little bit and probably feel bad about it for a spot. Even though it wasn’t his fault.

Light was not familiar with relationships like this. He thought that he had to be absolutely perfect, all the time for every last second, in order for him to be a proper boyfriend. Hell, he was absolutely perfect every time other than this one, but he was a bit afraid that one mistake could place doubt in her mind and the doubt would grow and ruin everything. Or else he was just being too paranoid, but of course Light was worried about this. His relationship with her was precious to him, and he had always seen her as something fragile. She was like glass in his hands sometimes; he had to be careful not to break her. He had always gotten that impression, that she was someone to be taken care of, and he had become almost paranoid about that ever since the incident on the date of her friend’s untimely death. The day she attempted suicide, and in doing so, scared the living hell out of him and let him know exactly what she was capable of. Not that he would think that she’d kill herself over him being late, no, of course not. He simply had ground it into his head that she needed to be cared for perfectly, and she needed him to be everything for her. It was a big responsibility, but he was always a responsible fellow anyways.

On the other hand, he was murdering thousands of criminals. Funny how things worked out that way.

[Fantasy]

One twist. The wire of the phone roped around her index finger once. The color of the thin black wire against her fair skin tone made a nice contrast as did the heat each of them made. The electricity running through the phone wire was muted by the plastic surrounding that second cord inside though it still had more heat than her hands which felt like she had been standing outside of the house all night even with the temperature down in the twenties. Obviously, she had been doing just that to wait for the man she loved with all her heart. The man she trusted to the core of her soul. The man who took her heart, soul, and mind then put them all to ease with a kiss the the lips, a kiss on her hand or a kiss on the forehead. It was easy for a man she loved so deeply to put her anxious feelings to rest. Even now, with the phone in her hands, she was still anxious, but it was different when she heard his voice. It made things much better even by a little. A little was enough for her because she might be discouraged if he didn't arrive, but she wouldn't hold it against him. There were other nights.

Two twists. The color on her index finger seemed a tad red compared to the rest of it connected to her hand as if she were cutting the circulation although she wasn't exactly meaning to do this since her hands were so cool already and nearly numb from being outside. Even so, she listened to him carefully with each word filling her mind. Her lips parted once he finished speaking. She responded with her tone much different than before as if she were panicked slightly by his assumption. "No, no. I'm not upset in the least. Please, come over. I'd love to see you." Another minute without you is too long. Her mind whispered silently finishing her words as she stared across from the phone to the photograph on her end table.

The photograph was a lovely one. The frame was a pretty golden color with little designs engraved into it where she used to have another picture which Light had used to realize there was someone else she had been so long ago. It had been his idea for her to replace the image to help her not focus on her memories so much. Every image in her house had been replaced with ones of them both, and she kept the old photographs in a small compartment inside her closet and above her clothing. It was in the very back behind old gifts or other memories. She hadn't the heart to have rid herself of every memory, but this picture was important. Light was wearing his a dark pair of pants with a thicker material. His shirt was covered by a larger green coat which was opened a tad at the top while a pretty white scarf roped around his neck trailed down to hers where she sat between his legs with his arms tucked around her completely. His mittened hands were around just below her chest. Her clothing that day had been a longer black skirt made of velvet with a matching jacket over her thick crimson sweater. A blanket was over their legs and beneath them and obviously hand made by his mother. The way he smiled with his scarf around her made that day seem so much warmer which was obvious by how dark her cheeks had been. She could remember that it had been Sayu who stole her camera and took the beautiful photograph. It had lead her to believe that the young girl should be a photographer or at least have her own camera which had lead Cassandra toward buying the younger sibling one. Ironically, that image had been taken only last weekend and had lead to her feelings strengthening.

Cassandra smiled as she twisted the wire around her finger yet again before she realized that she couldn't exactly feel it. It was only then that she allowed her finger to breath as she moved the wire in the opposite direction three times and brought the hand to her face flexing the finger a bit and making sure she could get back feeling. It had fell right when his words came again causing her face to light up. "Please do. I'd love to see you. We don't have to go anywhere or do anything, I just want to see you tonight." She said it with such a cuteness to her voice that it should be criminal, but then again Light knew all about what was criminal and what wasn't. "I just want you here. Would you please come over tonight?" The need had actually leaked into her voice so much that it made her feel embarrassed by her craving to just see him tonight. He had promised her that they could see one another tonight and that he would be leaving work earlier than usual, but she understood that he had been held up. That didn't change her wanting him. She always wanted him. If he had shown up at her house without a phone call, she would have been alright with it. There was a high possibility that she would just run down to the bottom level and meet him in the snow in just her slippers.

[[Sorry, It's short.]]